Well, recently i traveled to the planet VaJeyJey and met this really hot alien chick.
After we had super amazing alien to human sex i asked her to marry me after knowing her for about an hour.
She agreed & we hopped on my space ship and headed for earth. When we got to earth i parked in a handicap space ship parking space
by mistake and got a $367 ticket. After ripping up that piece of shit paper me and my new wife went to my house were
OJ Simpson and Michael Jackson were waiting for me because i was about to throw the best party in the fucking universe.
I invited Tony Montana and a lot of other super stars to the party and we all did coke off of Kate Upton's ass and jumped into my pool of purple Kool Aid.
After getting extremely wasted i decided to check back up on my wife and noticed that she was passed out on floor so i did the most rational thing an adult would do
when you see someone passed out on the floor..... i grabbed a sharpy and drew dicks all over her face and took pictures and uploaded them on facebook.
After the party was over i went to the kitchen to eat some fried chicken & watermelon and then wash it down with some grape soda but then collapsed from being so fucking wasted.
Yep, just a regular day.
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